How Do I Get A Positive Attitude?

I recently took a staycation-vacation up in Hollywood Beach, Florida with my aunt.  During my vacation, I had an epiphany. I am so negative.  I never really thought I was.  I thought my outlook was pessimistic, but nothing to get up in arms about.

hollywood beach view from window

Yet, here I was, in Hollywood, Florida, staring out the window overlooking the ocean, and in my head, I was complaining about something.  I have this beautiful view, and all I could think about is what is wrong with the world/my life/people/etc.

People have called me negative before, but I never really saw it that way. I considered myself a realist. You know, if my professor typically rejects my first ideas in my paper, why would he just accept this one particular idea on this one particular day.  I always prayed for the best, but expected the worst.  It lessens the blow when a disappointing outcome does occur.

Still, when I consider my little amazing-view-but-bad-attitude scenario, I wonder, what’s up with that? I mean, maybe that’s what people mean when they say I’m negative.  That I’m so consumed with these other thoughts that I cant enjoy the moment.  Sometimes,  I do enjoy the moment, but it just hasn’t been happening on the trip.

hollywood beach

Don’t get my wrong, I am thankful for this trip, and I needed it badly.  But it took a while for me to relax into it.  Maybe it’s because I carry too much of the past around with me.  I drag my outside life with me to a place where I’m supposed to relax and enjoy life.

hollywood beach trees

I decided that I’m going to start meditating. Maybe more yoga too, but mostly meditating. That way I can deliberately focus on being in the moment and clearing my mind of any negative thoughts that float around.

 

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